Not All Coping Skills Are the Same: A Categorized Guide to Managing Stress and Emotions
Because “take a deep breath” doesn’t always cut it.
Coping skills aren't one-size-fits-all. What helps you calm down one day might not work the next—and that's okay. Different situations call for different kinds of regulation. Sometimes you need to move your body. Sometimes you need to cry. Sometimes you just need a snack and a nap.
This list is here to help you build a toolkit across different types of coping—so you can meet your needs where they are, not where you think they “should” be.
🧠 Cognitive Coping (For Reframing Thoughts)
Talk back to your inner critic
Name the distorted thinking pattern (catastrophizing, black-and-white, etc.)
Write a "reality check" list
Use affirmations that actually feel believable
Journal the thought and reframe it with curiosity
Ask, “What would I say to a friend feeling this way?”
🧍♀️ Physical Coping (For Regulating the Nervous System)
Go for a walk
Dance it out to one loud song
Do jumping jacks or wall pushups
Take a hot shower or cold splash of water
Try bilateral stimulation (tapping thighs left-right, walking, etc.)
Curl up in a weighted blanket or soft hoodie
Stretch or shake out your arms and legs
💬 Social Coping (For Connection and Co-Regulation)
Call or text someone safe
Send a voice memo to a friend
Write a letter (even if you don’t send it)
Say out loud, “I’m struggling right now” to someone you trust
Let someone else make a decision for you (dinner, movie, plan)
Ask for a hug, hand hold, or time together
🎨 Creative Coping (For Emotional Expression)
Draw, scribble, doodle
Make a playlist that matches or shifts your mood
Do a craft or collage without trying to be “good” at it
Try clay, paint, or playdough
Free-write for 5 minutes
Create a mood board or photo collection that shows how you feel
🌿 Sensory Coping (For Grounding and Soothing)
Light a candle or use essential oils
Sip something warm or cold and notice every detail
Run your hands under warm water
Wrap up in a blanket burrito
Listen to ASMR or nature sounds
Use a fidget tool or soft fabric
Eat something with strong texture or flavor (mint, crunchy, sour)
📱 Distraction Coping (When You Need Space Before Processing)
Watch a funny or nostalgic show
Play a simple game (on your phone or with cards)
Organize a drawer or shelf
Scroll a calming or cozy TikTok feed
Bake something or try a new recipe
Clean one small area of your room
🧘♀️ Emotional Coping (For Feeling and Releasing)
Cry. Literally just cry.
Scream into a pillow
Write an “unsent letter” to someone
Give your feeling a name, color, shape
Let yourself do nothing without guilt
Practice self-compassion: “It makes sense I feel this way.”
❤️ Final Reminder:
Not all coping skills are meant to make you feel better right away.
Some are about making it through the next five minutes without checking out or spiraling.
Some are about helping your body feel safe enough to feel at all.
That matters.
